Name: Boring.

Age: John Wilkinson invented the first boring machine tool 241 years ago.

Relevance: Elon Musk is getting heavily into it.

This sounds like big news. Doesn’t it? Elon Musk achieves anything he sets his heart on. Paypal. Tesla. SpaceX. Maybe Hyperloop one day.

Right! This is definitely about Hyperloop, isn’t it? Um …

It must be! Musk is going to bore a load of tunnels underneath the ground, and he’s going to fill it with Hyperloop pods and soon we’ll all be able to commute to work at 700mph. Right? Well, no.

Then what? OK, prepare to be disappointed. On Saturday, Musk found himself stuck in traffic, so he tweeted the following: “Traffic is driving me nuts. Am going to build a tunnel boring machine and just start digging …”

Is he? It’s hard to say. He followed that tweet up with two more. One read: “It shall be called the Boring Company”, and the other read: “Boring, it’s what we do”.

Oh. Now we’re elevating Things That People Tweeted Because They Had Nothing Better To Do to news, are we? Well, no. Because then he tweeted: “I am actually going to do this”.

So, he’s really going to do it? Nobody knows. He has updated his Twitter bio to include: “Tunnels (yes, tunnels)”, if that counts for anything.

Oh, come on. This is like that time Katie Hopkins tweeted that she was going to put a sausage up her backside. She didn’t do that. No, but this is Elon Musk, the real-life Tony Stark, we’re talking about. He has vast amounts of money and a pioneering intellect. If anyone can transform a seemingly absent-minded half-joke into a world-changing technology, it’s him.

What will the Boring Company do? Who knows? He might create a brand new infrastructure specifically for driverless cars. He might begin to manufacture machines capable of drilling the first Hyperloop routes. He might, I don’t know, drill a tunnel to Mars. My stupid human brain isn’t powerful enough to keep up with Elon Musk.

I wish Elon Musk would invent a machine that allowed him to tweet with greater clarity. But then this would just be an empty page, and there’s no fun in that.

Do say: “Only bored people are boring.”

Don’t say: “It probably was just a joke, though.”

Source: The Guardian

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